Back to school!

Today is a big day at our house! ALL of the kids will be in school. While I know there are mamas who sit and cry in the corner over their last baby starting school, I'm not one of them. I get it, I really, really do. I empathize with you but I will not be the mama sitting with you.

While I get that your last baby is going to school, I'm embracing this phase in our life. I've embraced each phase as it's come and as it's gone. I realize my days of spending all day with my last baby are done, I get to celebrate and appreciate him a whole new way.

Luca is beyond ready to start kindergarten. I've been told before that he needs the stimulation. He's quick to learn and loves making friends. Heck, after less than a day, he learned to tie his shoe. I think he'll pick up the school routine quickly. Maybe not easily, but he'll get the hang of it quickly. The morning bustle, the getting on the bus, getting off the bus, finding his way, meeting new friends, embracing a different kind of routine, then coming home and all that comes along with end of the day stuff.

A new school year means new things for everyone. It means seeing old friends. It means welcoming and making new friends, which we've already accomplished this summer! It means new schedules, fresh lunches, routines, schedules, new teachers, new classmates. It's really exciting. I try to build up the excitement a lot at home, especially about how amazing their teachers will be. I really value and appreciate our teachers, which is another story.

Mama starts a new semester today too. It's hard to believe I've been teaching full time for almost 3 years. With each semester means changes as well. A new student group, a new schedule, new colleagues and old friends. I get a "fresh start" with each new trimester, it's kind of exciting and fun in my opinion.

I've asked Bella about talking to her class. I've done this EVERY YEAR since kindergarten. Here's the thing, this year I asked and she asked to wait and see.

"Mom I mostly know every one. I mean there are 3 new kids but let's just wait and see how the first day goes."

While I died a little inside, I watched her sweet little face. She was confident and strong. She was brave and happy. She is growing up and she's becoming more certain of who she is and what she wants. This makes me one proud mama. I'll keep you all posted on her final decision in the days to come!

Giving Tuesday

Giving Tuesday kicks off the season after Thanksgiving. According to the Giving Tuesday website, it kicks off the "charitable season of giving". This giving tuesday, I'm asking you to really think about the organization that you pick to donate... that is if you do. I'm asking you to give mindfully not mindlessly. Many organizations take our money and very little goes to the actual cause. It bothers me to think that money I have given in years passed does not 100% go to the cause I am supporting. 

The organization that means the most to our family today and every day is Camp No Limits. As many of you know, we attend camp every year. If we could attend every location, we would! But alas, work, school, life and finances for travel get in our way. Camp truly makes our year brighter. While we only attend once a year, the friendships that we make through camp last a lifetime. The support and love carry us through to the next time we attend camp. It's like having a family that supports you and lifts you up when you meet struggles. The kids and families that we meet through camp change our lives. 

I'm asking you to consider giving to Camp No Limits or give to our fund for travels to get to camp. Last year, it cost us over $3200 to get to camp, between airfare and rental car amongst other things. That said, it was worth every penny. I will continue to work my tail off every year to make camp a possibility for our family. Without the help of you and others like you, we would not have been able to attend camp. Last year, we received a scholarship to pay for camp and we only had to pay the $3200 to get there! That's a HUGE blessing! 

If Giving Tuesday is not your thing, no worries, I'll simply ask that you spread awareness. Spread awareness about Camp No Limits, spread awareness about limb differences, share our names with others so that I may help another family that is in our shoes, so that I can help them advocate for their child, so that I can be the support that they need, so that camp can be the family that they need, so that they can be aware of the many people that are in their shoes! 

Thank you for considering. Thank you for following our blog, for listening to our stories. 

Just say no

Remember D.A.R.E from 5th grade? Yeah I sure do. I took a lot of lessons from those sessions but I think I missed one. I must've missed the "just say no" part. I've completely and utterly overextended myself yet again. I mean who can't work full-time, be the PFC co-president, volunteer to do the kids class parties, teach a new class, maintain (or better yet grow) a marriage, keep three kids alive, and a dog, and four chickens, workout, eat healthy, try to be a better me for me, have good relationships with my kids, grow friendships, cultivate old friendships, keep up with emails, write agendas for meetings, organize camping trips, go camping then unpack from said trips, maintain a house, pay bills on time, grocery shop... I mean you get it, right?

This train wreck has pulled into the station and is taking a long, hard look at life. The "just say no" part of D.A.R.E was SO important, how come they only apply it to drugs and alcohol? Maybe they should have a refresher in college, when you are married, then again when you have kids... just saying! Today, I'm reevaluating.

What are my goals to be a better me? A better me means doing all of the things that I love too and not forgetting those in the shuffle. Part of being a better me means working out, giving attention to my kids, growing my marriage, helping friendships continue to grow... I have a big agenda and it's not getting smaller any time soon. For me, I'm going to start focusing on saying no instead of maybe, instead of yes, instead of let me think about it. Not because I WANT to say no, but because I NEED to say no... for me, for you, for everyone I love and adore.

Trust me, no one will die in the process of me saying no. No one will die if I don't do ALL of the class parties. My students will survive with me giving my all and cutting that all off by 10 pm. They need me sane as well as prepared. Lack of sleep leaves me unprepared and not sane, that's for sure. The junk mail, the junk emails, they can wait. The pile of papers by the door, that can wait too. The deep cleaning that I really want to do because it makes ME feel good, it'll have to wait.

There will be bumps along this road but I'm done overextending me. I'm doing what I need to do for me. Part of that includes increasing my water intake... simple yet forgotten. Part of that includes working out, lifting heavier weights and working out for less time. Part of that means sitting by the campfire to soak in the stars with my family.

Yes, this blog is about Bella. Ultimately, this blog is meant to help parents, women, mamas, working mamas... it's meant to help whoever it needs to help. Today, I'm hoping it helps you. Take a lesson from this mama, just say no. It's okay, I promise.

My heart and soul

I've had a rough week, as a mom, as an educator, as a wife, as a daughter. I can talk more about that later. With all that said, I've cried 3 times this week. Some weeks are just like that. I was thankful for it to be Friday and have a long weekend before school starts for the kids AND for me too!

Bella was having a rough night. Luca really wanted to sleep with her, the little snuggle bug. She needed some space. She agreed because she knew how bad he wanted to and that we'd allow it because it was the weekend. Then, she melted into a million emotions.

We talked and she expressed a lot of emotions. When I told her that I understood her being stressed out and feeling out of sorts. There's been a lot going on in our lives individually and as a family. She has such a pure heart and a genuine soul. When we continued talking, she expressed that she trusted "you and Daddy, I really know that I can trust you. If I tell you something and ask you not to tell anyone, you don't." My heart melted into a million pieces. She realizes that she can confide in me and that I won't tell anyone. This says a lot about what she thinks about me. I'm glad that she knows that I'm a trusting person.

As we continued to talk, she made me realize that I'm doing okay as a mom. Sometimes as moms, we really struggle. I struggle with working full time, being a mom, doing volunteer stuff for school, being a wife, a good friend, maintaining our marriage, feeding my soul, working out and feeling strong... it's a constant balance. Sometimes, one side of the scale is heavier than the other. Today it was. Bella said to me "you and dad are really great parents, you really are." I thanked her for sharing that with me. I told her how I was proud of her and that's she's a really great kid.

Tonight, the scale was heavy on the mom side. Tonight, I cried happy tears. My girl gets me.

Be the change

Bella has a way to make everybody feel like somebody. I'm not sure where exactly she gets it. No one is overlooked when she is around. She is genuinely concerned about everyone. She really has a way to make people feel included and loved when she's around. It's one of the things that I adore most about her.

I challenge you to take a little lesson from my girl. I learn daily from her. I learn how to really put myself out there to make people feel included. Last night at a playdate for my soon to be first grader, there were many parents I didn't know. While I'm usually pretty social, I tend to stick around the people that I know best. Last night, I thought of Bella. At that playdate, I walked around and tried to introduce myself. I tried to at least have some sort of conversation with people.

 I want Grayson to have the best opportunity in school. I want parents to know me and feel comfortable having their children at our house. I want them to feel like I at least tried to connect with them. Part of him having great opportunities is how engaged I am as a parent. Be engaged with your kids, meet their friends, meet the parents, talk to them all. Part of me engaging with the kids is getting to know their friends. It allows me the ability to know their friends, know how they are being influenced at school and have their friends feel comfortable with me.

Again, take a lesson from my girl. Be the change!

Camp No Limits- The last full day

The morning ran the same, breakfast, energizers, OT/PT, life skills and sibling groups, lunch then peer support groups. During OT Bella got to try some other prosthetics, which was really fun AND she got to test out the i-limb. Can I mention that the i-limb costs $90,000?! Holy batman. It was really interesting to watch all of the upper limb difference kids try it. Bella was able to trigger it perfectly to get the hand to open and close... to which her response was "This will be my next hand!". Lord help me! I know there are grants and other programs that make this sort of thing possible. If she continues to use her sports arm, then we may pursue something more.

(Hungry hungry hippos, human style!)

Next up, slip and slide. This was insanely fun! Who knew?! We watched campers, staff, volunteers and parents go down. The facial expressions while watching at the bottom were hilarious! I know you are dying to know if I went down it... you bet! I mean it's not every day that theres a slip and slide that's big enough for an adult. Ryan didn't go down it. Loser :) I'd be lying if I said I wasn't afraid for my life while I went down. I did slide off the end and into the grass. It was quite fun and the kids are sure to agree.

Water front activities were next. We found out that Camp Cross doesn't have a provision in their contract for stand up paddle boards which meant that an adult had to be on the paddle boards when someone that was under 18 was using one. Bummer for the kids because they really enjoyed it. Next year, Mel talked about building this into our Camp No Limits programming. However, if you know someone in the Idaho/Wisconsin area that would come to Camp Cross and do adaptive sports, we could have a whole day of adaptive water front activities! Please connect them with me if you do! Email me

The last night is always a slide show, talent show, and dance. Honestly, I want to cry every time I see the slide show. There are so many moments that other people capture of my kids or other kids that make my heart melt. Watching ALL of the kids at camp grow in just a few short days is worth every penny. They make tremendous growth in activities of daily living, being more effective with or without prosthetics, running, walking, buttoning, pony tails, shoe tying... most of all, the amount of confidence they gain in this time is worth a million dollars.

The talent show... oh dear Lord where do I begin... with this I will share one photo before I tell more.

Please tell me that you didn't laugh? I about died a million deaths! What good sports these guys were! 

Shine's hair shop was a big success. The "customers" left with lip STAIN, moles, mascara and who knows what else. The best part of the talent show is seeing the kids have SO much confidence to present something that they are proud of or be creative. I love it! Not to mention, I loved that Ryan was willing to put on a dress, witches hat, wig and feather boa all for his daughter. I got a good one!

They finish the night up with a dance. By this point, Bella was exhausted. She's our girl that has no problem saying when she's ready for bed. About 45 minutes into the dance, she asked to go to bed! It was fun seeing all the kids just let loose and dance around. Even parents and volunteers got in on the action. Truly no judgement, which is the best part of the whole thing!