Friday, September 1, 2017

My heart and soul

I've had a rough week, as a mom, as an educator, as a wife, as a daughter. I can talk more about that later. With all that said, I've cried 3 times this week. Some weeks are just like that. I was thankful for it to be Friday and have a long weekend before school starts for the kids AND for me too!

Bella was having a rough night. Luca really wanted to sleep with her, the little snuggle bug. She needed some space. She agreed because she knew how bad he wanted to and that we'd allow it because it was the weekend. Then, she melted into a million emotions.

We talked and she expressed a lot of emotions. When I told her that I understood her being stressed out and feeling out of sorts. There's been a lot going on in our lives individually and as a family. She has such a pure heart and a genuine soul. When we continued talking, she expressed that she trusted "you and Daddy, I really know that I can trust you. If I tell you something and ask you not to tell anyone, you don't." My heart melted into a million pieces. She realizes that she can confide in me and that I won't tell anyone. This says a lot about what she thinks about me. I'm glad that she knows that I'm a trusting person.

As we continued to talk, she made me realize that I'm doing okay as a mom. Sometimes as moms, we really struggle. I struggle with working full time, being a mom, doing volunteer stuff for school, being a wife, a good friend, maintaining our marriage, feeding my soul, working out and feeling strong... it's a constant balance. Sometimes, one side of the scale is heavier than the other. Today it was. Bella said to me "you and dad are really great parents, you really are." I thanked her for sharing that with me. I told her how I was proud of her and that's she's a really great kid.

Tonight, the scale was heavy on the mom side. Tonight, I cried happy tears. My girl gets me.

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