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Showing posts from April, 2016

Refilling my tank

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Every other year since 2012, I've gone on a girl's trip with four friends from "home"... Two of us have moved away and two remain in the Kansas City area. I'm the one that lives the furthest away. Between the four of us there are: four husbands, eleven kids (one set of twins), fifteen plus years of friendship, twenty-sevenish years of college... they are good solid friendships, the kind that pick up like you never missed a beat or haven't talked in months. This year, only two of us could go. It was unfortunate but life and love sometimes take priority, the great thing is there are no hard feelings and everyone understands.



This year, Ginny and I went to Dallas! Two years ago we all four went to San Antonio, the first year was Chicago... what's with Texas though, really?! We had a great time, almost got hit by a semi on our way to the hotel, we stayed up late, slept in until 9:30 (um hello that's FOUR hours of sleeping in for this mama who gets up at 5…

Dinner date

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Tonight Bella and I redeemed her Book it pizza reward... yep they STILL do the Book it program they did when I was a kid. It's so motivating and fun! Anyhow, she got to go on a date just her and I. She wanted to redeem her Book it reward for a pizza with bacon and cheese only... she is her father's daughter for sure!



We got her pizza and headed to Target. We sat in the Starbuck's and talked about her week and my week. She gobbled down the whole pizza! When did my tiny little string bean become such a darling first grader with a wiggly tooth?!


I was admiring her sweet face and listening to her talk about her little life. I watched her expressions and embraced the time, just the two of us. I noticed the freckle on her chin was getting darker and said something.

"Wow boo that freckle is darker" as I pointed out her little chin freckle.

"Yeah mom, that's where your daddy kissed me."

"What did you say?" Thinking I already knew the answer.

"…

Rock on sista!

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Bella has her own sense of style. I tried to fight it early on then discovered that it was just not worth it. We would fight before school about why she should match and what her options were. We tried picking out the clothes the night before= FAIL. We tried giving choices, this outfit or that outfit= FAIL. We tried letting her pick out matching outfits= FAIL. All those failures lead to frustration and tears on her part and sometimes on mine.

One day it clicked. Why did I care if she matched? Did I have something to prove? Why shoot down her confidence if she felt good in what she had on? Why not let her chose? What was it hurting? How would our mornings be if we didn't feel frustrated? We came up with a solution, if its weather appropriate, rock on with your bad self.... and so it went and so it still goes.
Oh look, here we are at Target. She really wanted a picture with Spot the Target dog. Notice the leggings, the pink skirt and her school logo sweatshirt. Did I mention she has…

To the lady at Walmart

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Why yes my daughter is six going on sixteen. Yes she tried on a size seven and a size eight. No it's NOT okay for you to make comments on the sizes of her clothes. It's not okay now, it's not okay ever... let's be clear, no one is allowed to make comments on the sizes my daughters wears!

Bella happens to be between sizes. She also happens to have legs from here to California. She was born a string bean and she remains a string bean. It seems like her legs are constantly growing! She has a long torso too. She's obsessed with leggings and happened to find some in shorts. You can imagine her singing her praises to the Lord when she found them... this was just after she talked a guy into giving her the last zucchini in the produce section. To which later she told me was because she's SO pretty... Oh boy do I ever have my hands full...

I texted my mom as she was in the dressing room... because God forbid I actually GO into the dressing room with her. I texted "…

DENIED!

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The sweet ladies at Listen to Your Mother sent me an email and said that I was not chosen. Yep, denied! However, I'm not letting that get me down. I'm not letting my story not be heard. I've done a video of my story... I'm really nervous to share it. I feel like I've shared it with all of you a million times over... in a million different ways. Maybe you are tired of hearing it... or maybe there is ONE person that still NEEDS to hear it. Maybe I can help one person. To me, that would make it worth it all.

Ultimately, I can't please everyone. I can't be chosen by everyone. I can make the CHOICE to not let this set me back, get me down or bother me. I can take this opportunity to share the piece I've written with all of you... in hopes that it gets shared or passed to the right person so that our story can help someone else.


It takes a village

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About this time last year, I posted asking how on earth do I help my one-handed girl hold a pom pom on her left hand without fingers. I had racked my brain, I had tried numerous things. Some she tried and the pom went flying, others she complained of discomfort. I remember my plea on Facebook for someone to suggest something. Kim D., a mama to a beautiful adult one-handed daughter, reached out and even offered to send me what she used. I couldn't thank her enough! She sent it right away and we put it right to work. Her daughter had cheered for a number of years. If you met her daughter, you would understand the apple didn't fall far from the tree. They are both the most open, genuine, kind hearted women. Kim happens to also be a nurse. Her and her daughter were at CNL in Florida last year with us. It takes a village my friend!

Here is what she sent- (I later found out they can be purchased at Home Depot, although I'm not sure what the "real" use is)
Today, a mama…

Lowest low

This morning, I was leaving for work and as I watched my babies sitting at the table eating breakfast I wondered, "Where did my BABIES go?" How do I have a 3 year old, a 5 year old and a 6 year old already? When did the days fade into months and then fade into years? I blinked and the years had passed. Somewhere amidst the million loads of laundry, the short order cooking, school, work, life... it had flashed passed!

I was looking at our "baby" who is now three and thinking back to the first time my heart shattered... In early July 2013, Bella and I were watering the yard and our new plants. When my innocent little 3 year old girl asked "How come we can't plant seeds in my hand for fingers to grow?" My heart shattered into a million tiny pieces, I fought back the tears that welled in my eyes. How could my child ask me this? How did she even relate the two? Where did this come from?

Thinking back, we had planted flowers a few months earlier from seeds.…

Self-care

As mama's we tend to put ourselves on the back burner. Or at least I do! I know it's the same for my closest mom friends too. I saw it with my own mom at times as well. We put our needs last, our families needs, the kid's needs, the house, dinner, the grocery store, Target, Walmart, the dog... everything else comes before US. How can we pour from an empty cup?

Lately, my cup has felt less than full. I've been busy interviewing and doing stuff to try to put our lives and our home back in order after working so much and preparing for all these interviews. I have taken very little time for me to refill and refuel.

Recently, two people in my life have been diagnosed with cancer. It's kind of hit me like a ton of bricks. Both are mama's of at least three kids, both are young (under 50)... Now they HAVE to take time for them, they have to allow themselves time to heal and mend. Although, I'm positive it's not the "me" time they wanted and I'm sure…