Tuesday, May 3, 2016

Mom guilt

I've talked about it before and I'm readdressing it today. Yesterday I was working my first day at my new job. (Yay for full-time faculty position less than a year after getting my master's degree!) I received a phone call from Bella's school. I was in a meeting and unable to answer. Then I received a text message from my mom "Bella has a tummy ache and is hunched over and school called me". Then a few minutes later, I received a text message from my mother-in-law "Bella is in the office and I'm at the doctor". I politely excused myself, listened to my voicemail then called Bella's school.

I was told that Bella was in the office with a tummy ache. Que the nurse mom... 

"Is she puking?"

"Well, no."

"Does she have diarrhea?"

"No, but she's been here for 20 minutes complaining of her tummy hurting."

"Does she have a fever?"


"Do you think she's contagious, needs to go to the doctor or the ER?"

"I don't think so, she just says her tummy hurts"

"Ok well then unfortunately she'll have to stay at school because I'm working and it's just a tummy ache. She can rest for awhile longer then she needs to go back to class. Call me if she gets worse."

"Um okay but most mom's come get them if they've been in the office awhile."

"Well it's my first day at my new job and I can't come get her for a tummy ache, sorry."


Maybe it's because I'm a pediatric nurse, maybe it's because I'm a working mom, maybe it's because if I pick her up for a tummy ache then I know she'll want to have a tummy ache and come home in the future.

Regardless, I hung up and felt like total $hit... I'm NOT MOST mom's... I'm a nurse, a pediatric nurse and I have a full time job. I love my kids and I would absolutely leave work and go pick her up if I felt like it was necessary. It also freaked out both mom's (my mom and my mother-in-law) that school called them. Does a tummy ache deem it necessary to call EVERYONE on the emergency contact list? I would love to hear everyone's thoughts on this. I personally felt like it was completely unnecessary but I would love to hear both ends of the spectrum to put my own thoughts in check.

Fast forward to today, we unloaded her lunch... guess what, she felt well enough to eat the cookie out of her lunch but not the rest. When talking with her, I explained that her tummy probably hurt because it was hungry. I asked her "What did you want mommy to do for you?"

"I don't know but my stomach did hurt" She said with a giant smile.

"Well you HAVE to eat your lunch honey because if you don't, your body doesn't feel well. You can't learn or play if you don't eat because your body needs fuel."

"Yeah mom, I know"

Needless to say, she came home yesterday and ate a GIANT dinner. She played in the backyard, running around and chasing her brothers. She was great.

What would you have done in my shoes? Do you think its necessary to call the entire emergency contact list for a tummy ache? What would you have said to the school nurse?

1 comment:

  1. I think you were right to leave her at school. You asked the right questions. Maybe they need to be asking them and not calling everyone on the contact list. Veronica


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