Wednesday, August 26, 2015

Back seat blogger

I have no excuses, only reality. We've had an insanely busy summer and the blog for Bella has taken a back seat. I'm a mom first and foremost. I'm also a pediatric nurse, a clinical instructor, a full time graduate student, a wife, a dog owner, a crafter... wait I was a crafter... well anyhow, it's been busy! I'll catch you up on the rest of that stuff later!

Bella starts first grade in one week. We had a meet the teacher night tonight and I loved her teacher. I'm excited that she is in class with some of her best buds. I'm thrilled that she's over the moon about going back to school, learning more and seeing her friends again.... her words, not mine! Her first grade teacher said her kindergarten teacher described her as "super confident and does everything the other kids do". I loved her kindergarten teacher too. Kindergarten went off without a hitch, no major issues with her limb difference camp up. Her first grade teacher and I decided it would be best for me to come chat with the class the first or second week of school. I'll let you know how it goes. Maybe I could video it if anyone is interested. Let me know what you all need and want!

This summer was great, busy and hot and just the way we like it. I'll fill you in on all of that soon, promise! I do want to share an experience we had at the park just this week while it's fresh in my head. We went to a local park that we frequent and there was another family there, a mom and dad and two girls, ages 8 and 4. I said hi and we all went on our way playing. The boys climbing a giant spider web thing and Bella heading for the balance beam. Less than five minutes passed and Bella went to ask the older girl "Do you want to play with me?"

The girl covered her face and crunched up her eyes and didn't say anything.

Bella repeated "Do you want to play with me?"

The girl continued and up popped the mom. "Honey what's wrong?"

"I'm scared of... I'm scared... I'm scared of her hand" said the 8 year old.

"You don't have to play with her if you are scared of her" the mom said as she walked away with her child.

I stood by. What I really want to do was throat punch the mom for not taking the opportunity to teach her child about differences and that there was no reason to be frightened or afraid. It's not like Bella was going to hurt her or the girl could catch a disease from her. For the love of Pete, TEACH YOUR CHILD lady! Yet still, I watched. Thanking God that my mom wasn't around or a throat punch wouldn't have been second guessed by her!

Bella and the boys played on the spider web, the balance beam and the monkey bars. I had visions of Emergency room visits and broken bones... ah the joys of being a pediatric nurse. I can't put my kids in a bubble even though I'd like to sometimes. I helped the mother's 4 year old across the balance beam, because it wasn't the kids fault her mom was a moron and she asked for my help. With a smile, I helped each kiddo across the beam, each of mine then the other mother's daughter.

Bella approached the older girl again... because really who doesn't love a little pressure :) "Do you want to play with me? You don't have to be scared of my hand. I was just born this way. I can do everything you do. You don't have to be scared, let's play!" My child stood there smile, educating, welcoming, lovingly embracing this girls fear over something my child had no control.

"You don't have to play with her if you are scared honey" said the mom. The devil was standing on one shoulder begging me to donkey punch this mom in the gut, while I'm pretty sure my dad was standing on the other telling me to chill and let my daughter handle this. The 8 year old turned to her mom and smiled and off she went with Bella. At that moment I was thankful for sunglasses, thankfully for my ability to hold back my tears, tears of sadness and joy, thankful for the distraction of having two boys that were at the top of the spider web giving me a heart attack.

I stood away from the mom and the dad. I played with my kids and theirs while they sat on a bench watching. I helped their daughter across the balance beam more times than I can count. I laughed and chased them all. I played tag. I had self-control, I'm proud of myself for that! Those that know me, know I often speak my mind.

As I helped Bella across the monkey bars, the other mom stood up. "Wow SHE can do the monkey bars?! I'm surprised!"

"Don't be" I said with a smile, "She can do everything your daughters can do. Don't be surprised" I continued to help Bella across the monkey bars. I looked at my green eyed girl "Right B?"

"Right mom!"

I didn't donkey punch her, I didn't throat punch her.  Education is my first priority. I'm sad I didn't educate her more, although it this situation, I needed to hold back my words of anger, irritation, sadness and frustration. I'm proud of myself and my husband. We have given our daughter confidence and courage to speak up to others. She was not ashamed. Instead, she educated! I'm proud of Bella for having the words to express, a heart of gold and a mind of determination!

1 comment:

  1. You are a better mom than me! Good lord, I'm so proud of you for not becoming an episode of "Cops". I think your Daddy's angel sits tight with you in those moments when you want to go postal on people. Love you all madly!!


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